Should women use their title Dr outside a professional context (or indeed in any context)
Yes.
Next question.
That should be the end of it, but not for the first time this week, myself and fellow PhDs (and MDs) found our use of 'Dr' in everyday life questioned. The gist seems to be that using 'Dr' on say a bank card, or a dinner reservation or hell just introducing yourself is seen, for a woman particularly as somehow putting ourselves above our station.
Well let me stop you right there: we earned that station.
Again it should be that simple.
But women (particularly) using Dr on anything from their Twitter profile to their shop loyalty card is somehow seen as being 'up ourselves'. Now on one hand no the title Dr isn't NEEDED on my Matalan card, but also it's my title...if I wasn't a Dr I'd answer 'Ms' or 'Mrs' because society dictates we have to prefix our names with something...and mine is Dr...
In all honesty I have a mix of things when I use Dr outside work context. But mostly it's unapologetic pride. I did recently get a Matalan card and the girl asked me 'Ms or Mrs' and I said 'Dr' and for a second I felt embarrassed, like I was being snotty about it. But then I thought 'Fuck it that's my name'. And just this week I was filling in something or other online and clicked Dr and thought 'Fuck yeah, I'm a Dr.' and I'm bloody proud. Because I'll tell you a secret...sometimes I still can't quite believe it either.
I haven't worked in Academia as my full time job since I got my PhD. I've taught, and when I do I'm introduced as 'Dr Emily Garside'. This is a marker of my achievement in my career, of my expertise on the subject, and my 'role' in that situation. But equally when I teach outside academia (as I do in thaetre occasionally) I'm introduced as 'Dr Emily Garside' again for the same reasons. This is judged as 'kind of ok' by the men saying we shouldn't.
But I also use my title elsewhere. When I worked in Professional Services at a University, my email sign off included my title (it was the culture at my institution for everyone to use their title be the Ms Mr Dr Prof etc). My business email signature also includes Dr, as does my CV. Why? because firstly it's a professional qualification. Secondly because it's a big part of my identity.
I never inisit on being called 'Dr' to my face. And that's no different to if I was a Ms, or Mrs. My incredibly working class roots mean I would never want to be addressed formally, other than something like at the start or a talk or lecture. My name is Emily. That's what I expect students and colleagues to call me wherever I work. Some of that is also doing a PhD in a post-92 institution. I called the Dean by his first name when I was lowest rank admin and when I was a PhD and for me I wouldn't want to work somewhere I had to bow and curtsey and call someone 'Dr this' or 'Professor that' when we are colleagues. I also don't expect students to call me that, my name is Emily, my title is Dr.
My friends jokingly call me Dr G and I jokingly refer to myself as 'Dr Angels' on social media, I imagine my learned friends the men would take issue with that. But I do it because actually that's what I'm known for. In an utterly wanky description it's part of my 'personal brand' in an utterly honest one, it's part of my identity. You try researching something for over a decade and have it not become part of you. It's jokey and fun, but also if my friends are saying it their way (I think!) of also saying 'yeah we know what you achieved and we like it' (and also when they call me 'Dr AIDS' their way of making fun of it. And Dr Mrs [insert actor crush name here])
A pause for a story on that. I post on a theatre forum regularly. When Angels in America was on at the National, I was naturally posting a lot about it. Mainly because people would ask me questions about it. Naturally I referred to directly and indirectly my PhD during that. A man on that forum got so incensed with the I assume attention this was getting, and after arguing with me about my referencing my PhD IN RELATION TO THE TOPIC UNDER DISCUSSION has since changed his username to 'Dr' **** on that forum. But a woman using Dr on her debit card is ridiculous?
My PhD was hard won. I am not being dramatic when I say I will bear the scars of it for a long, long time. But I'm also immensely proud of it. Yesterday happened to be the anniversary of me getting the final bound copy. Whatever has happened since, I am so very proud of that ridiculous thesis. It is the greatest thing I have ever achieved and as a result of that achievement I was given the title Dr, and I wear that with pride. It is a marker of what I achieved.
Nobody questions a Reverend going by their title in everyday life. Nobody questions someone from the military doing it. Why as a Dr, and as a woman am I different?
I admit to this striking particularly hard due to my current employment situation. I'm temping (again) and working at a hospital. I spend my days surrounded by Doctors, while having it assumed I am not one. That's hard. And believe me when I say the minute one of them (or a patient) crosses a line of rudeness I will be uttering the words 'That's Dr Garside to you by the way' . Here's the flip side though, it's interesting to me how medical doctors use and perceive their title to afford them some elevation over others. I don't believe I should be treated any better or worse because of my title, and yet in my current role where it's assumed I don't have it...I'm at the very bottom of the pecking order. I do wonder what might happen the day I turn to one of those Doctors and say 'By the way...it's Dr Garside'
And here's what will actually happen: 90% of them don't treat me as any less of an intelligent human being because I'm a receptionist. If they find out I have a doctorate they would be surprised I'm working there, interested in what I've done and possibly have a conversation with me as an 'academic peer' on discovering we have something in common. That's all that would change. The 10% who would suddenly treat me differently, were clearly asshats to begin with who value titles over basic human decency.
Because when I ask to be called by my title, it's not a cry to be treated better, more reverently, or regarded as superior. It's simply a request to have my earned, and chosen title recognized. Nobody questions a woman saying 'Mrs' and insisting on that post-marriage. Why then is insisting on Dr (the process of which lasted longer than many a marriage) any different? Some women grow up waiting to change their name to Mrs (and all love and no disrespect to that either) I always wanted to be Dr. (For anyone interested it was of course Dr Dana Scully that made that a dream). For me it's also a useful gender-neutral and irrespective of marriage signifies- I personally wouldn't have used Mrs if I'd got married and stuck to the more neutral 'Ms' because that's just not for me. Many women take great pride in the prefix Mrs, and all love and respect to them. Be proud you are married, proudly take your husbands name. I 100% support you. I personally wouldn't, but I do wear my Dr title with pride.
But the bottom line is: I earned the title Dr and I'm damn well going to use it. No matter what any man tries to tell me to do.
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