Running update! because what's more boring than running? some wanker talking about running....
For those who don't know, I foolishly on what can very much be described as a 'whim' signed up to the Cardiff Half Marathon. Why? honestly, who knows. Basically, my friend said he was doing it half challenged me to, and apparently, my competitive spirit kicks in occasionally.
At the time I signed up I was probably at my least fit in years. Which wasn't totally unfit, but I had reached a fitness slump. I was going through the motions with my gym routine and the odd run thrown in but putting not much effort into either. Sure I could shuffle around a 5k, and throw some weights about. I wasn't getting any less fit...but I wasn't getting fitter either.
Because as much as I know I like running, I also know running is hard. And personally, it's 'easier' for me to throw some weights about in a gym. So I needed a kick up the arse. Apparently, that took a few weeks to kick in because I was one reluctant runner for some time. And then suddenly (as 15 odd years of fitness training SHOULD tell me by now) it all kicked in and I noticed this thing called progress.
In the last week, in particular, I realised it was suddenly easier. I was suddenly enjoying it all the time (ok not in that heatwave) and that surprise surprise, I looked forward to running.
But actually, this was less about running more about mental health. Looking back, I realise my fitness nose-dive was alongside a mental health nose-dive. The first half of 2019 wasn't fun. For various reasons, it felt like an 'everything imploding but very slowly' type year. A sort of insidious disaster in the making. And with it a sort of creeping mental health crash too. I credit my exercise routine for staving that off from being any worse- I luckily rarely dip to the point I don't exercise, and exercise helps keep me off that point.
Physically it's not been plain sailing. As a dyspraxic somewhat moose-like runner I'm uncoordinated as hell. Shown by an epic 'wipe out' of a fall a couple of weeks back, in which I finished the run with blood running down my arm. Add to that my Ulcerative Colitis (oh yes, it's been a hot second since I talked about poo on this blog right?). Which means there's been times I'm running through either a fatigue day, or simply a 'searing abdominal pain' day. And yes, there's something about running that while in the long term seems to make me more healthy, but also shakes up my insides making me worry slightly...and yes I do find myself worrying that I'll end up with a flare up during the race week. But you know what, ill or not, I'll limp around.
And obviously physically I'm getting fitter, and that's great. But also mentally I'm much healthier for running. Like the physical gains, it's slowly, incremental but has a lasting and real effect. To the point I know now I won't ever let the running slide again because of the very real effect on mental health it has.
I said I was running this half marathon for me. As something that wasn't remotely career connected, something I could just do for me. Because the trouble with 'do what you love' for a living is that you do little but work. Having to have a 'day job' means that unlike 'normal people' my days are split between 'that work' and 'my work'. I love 'my work' but most evenings and weekends are taken up with writing. And despite loving theatre, and it is my main 'hobby' as well as part of my job, it means much of my social life is also taken up with 'work'.
More to the point if you're running you can't physically be writing. More importantly, having to go for a run means a legitimate hour or more where I don't have to write. And that my friends, is golden.
I'm sure some writers use running as 'thinking time' and 'oh darling I come up with my best ideas while running an ultra-marathon' well good for you bro (it's going to be a bro). For contrast here are some snippets of my interior monologue from this morning's run:
'Dog!'
'Is there a hill if I run that way?'
'Do I have to do 10k really?'
'Dog!'
'That's got to be 5k already surely?'
'If I run 10k I could go an buy some kind of desert surely'
'Dog! Dog! Dog!'
'I swear this wasn't a hill last week'
'What's for lunch?'
'Fuck me is that a goose...fucking hell it's coming at me...oh look a dog!'
You get the idea...I'm not saying I don't daydream, but I don't use running for anything other than escaping everything else. And it's working pretty well. It's the ultimate 'me time' because nobody can demand anything of you while you're a sweaty mess running around Roath Park (let's not pretend I'm that posh it's usually the shitty leisure centre near me).
Training is going well. I'm up to 15k on a long run, and three 5-7k runs a week. I'm not worrying about time, just getting around, but there's a small improvement there too, gradually. Distance and getting around without falling. That's the aim. Everything else is a bonus.
And so it's fitting that I'm running the half marathon for Big Moose. A brilliant local charity whose aims are:
1. mental health
2. homelessness
3. the prevention of suicide.
This marathon is doing me the world of good. And I hope by raising some money for them I'll help some other people as well.And if you think you could spare maybe the price of a cup of coffee to sponsor this moose running, I'd really appreciate it.
You can sponsor me here and I'll send you a moose picture.
No comments:
Post a Comment